When it comes to sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll, alcohol is the clear drug of choice: More songs have been written about vino, suds and spirits than all non-liquid intoxicants combined.
Of course, not all drinking songs pack an equal punch. For every witty or poignant tune about the perils of trying to cure heartache with hooch, there's some half-baked song that sings the praises of mindless binge-drinking.
Which brings us to St. Patrick's Day, a cultural and religious celebration which, for a lot of people, is just one big excuse to get sloshed. To mark this annual "alcohol-a-day," here's a look at 5 of the dumbest drinking songs in pop, rock and beyond.
"Have a Drink On Me," AC/DC (1980)
Mere months after the great Bon Scott died at 34 of what a coroner ruled as "acute alcohol poisoning," his band-mates seemed to endorse his tragic death with this gallows-humor ode to getting "blinded out of your mind."
"Arrested for Driving While Blind," ZZ Top (1976)
The Bearded Boys from Texas have said this isn't a pro-drunk driving tune — but it doesn't sound very anti-drunk driving, either. In this catchy shuffle about drinking whiskey and "itchin' for that wonderful feel / Of rollin' in an automobile," the song's narrator implies the only drawback to driving blotto is getting caught by the cops.
"Gin and Juice," Snoop Dogg (1993)
Snoop launched his career with this earworm about how good it feels to drive under the influence of Seagram's and sinsemilla. "Who listens to the words I speak / As I take me a drink to the middle of the street."
"I Drink Alone," George Thorogood & the Destroyers (1985)
The song's anti-hero is clearly dealing with a serious alcohol addiction, but the subject is played for laughs as George Thorogood sees how many different whiskey and beer brands he can plug.
"It's Five O'Clock Somewhere," Alan Jackson with Jimmy Buffett (2003)
What's the best way to deal with everyday stress? By binge-drinking, according to this song. The protagonist here gets so fed up with work he leaves at noon and goes on a daylong bender, accompanied by — you guessed it — Jimmy Buffett.