Some of us can't wait for virtual reality to make it to TV. Or can we?
We'd get the full experience of The Amazing Race ... the sights, the sounds, the, uh, smells.
That came to mind as the teams left Africa and arrived in France. In Paris, in what looked to be summer, the teams had to constantly run to their destinations, so you knew they were ripe. Tourists were in shorts, sweating, and everyone, even the prancing Phantom Blanc guy who handed out clues, looked as if they smelled like recess. No doubt, the River Seine winding through Paris threw off a scent. And one of the tasks involved the handling of shrimp.
You can see why Eau de Cologne was invented in France.
But we tremendously digress.
The episode, titled "My Tongue Doesn't Even Twist That Way", started out with a daring 364-foot bungee jump in Zimbabwe. Here's one spoiler: Everyone survived.
And so they moved on to Paris with #TeamTexas smiling and saying "I'm ordering some French fries."
Before you proceed, the rest of this report is lousy with spoilers. If you're DVR is full, clear off some of those Minority Reports because that show isn't lasting much longer.
Spoilers
The start: Masuwe Safair Lodge, Victoria Falls, Zimbabwe.
The finish: Paris, France.
Episode 4 name: My Tongue Doesn't Even Twist That Way
Starting teams (8): #ChacAttack (Cindy and Rick Chac), #TeamAlabama (Denise Williams and James Earl Corley), #TheTrackStars (Jazmine Lewis and Danielle Littleton), #TheGreenTeam (Justin Scheman and Diana Bishop), #TheReporters (Kelsey Gerckens and Joey Buttitta), #ThePaparazzi (Logan Fazio and Chris Gordon), #TeamTexas (Josh Ahern and Tanner Kloven), #TheCheerleaders (Tiffany Chantell and Krista Debono).
The Pit Stop: Host Phil Keoghan is greeting the teams at The Arc De Triomphe. But it's no "de triumph" at all. The episode will continue next week. Justin and Diana are the first ones to arrive and are told they have to start the next leg right away.
Road Blocks: The first is the bungee jump. The teams had to test their heart rates with a device that suspiciously looked like product placement. Luckily, no one's heart exploded from plunging 364 feet toward a body of water. The next road block is at the Musée Volant Salis in rural France. Team members have to fly in a vintage biplane and, from the air, spot three words that resemble the French Revolution (liberaté, élgalité, and fraternité). The team that stumbled the biggest was Team Paparazzi. Logan, who was rather terse with Chris before the flight, forgot to look for the third word. Chris seemed to have the word we were all looking for when she got back, but he took the high road and kept quiet.
#TeamTexas #BustACrab success! #AmazingRace pic.twitter.com/LrlG99LmZj
— The Amazing Race (@AmazingRaceCBS) October 31, 2015
Detour: You either Bust a Crab or Drops Mic. In Bust a Crab, you had to go a La Coupole to replicate a Royal Platter of shrimp and other fancy foods. #TeamTexas conquered it in two tries. Chac Attack got it in one. Everyone else went with Drops Mic where you had to rap in French with local rapper Passi. It wasn't as easy as it sounds as the French are picking about pronunciation, rhythm and vibe. That was bad news for Team Alabama. Denise, who has a distinctive Alabama drawl, can't get through some of the lyrics. She was on Take 18, which might be the reason this episode is continued.
Who finished first: Justin and Diana, but they're getting on each other's nerves.
Who's out: No one. Hey, CBS, if you edited this thing tighter, you'd probably get the whole thing in.
Texas connection: #TeamTexas would never work in Dean Fearing's kitchen. It took them two tries to get the shrimp centerpiece just right.
