Entertainment

07:44 AM CST on Wednesday, January 11, 2006

THE SHOW: South Beach, a self-conscious crime opera set among the beautiful but insecure

OUR HERO: Sensitive, smoldering Brooklyn construction worker Matt Evans (Marcus Coloma) travels to Miami to find his model ex-girlfriend Arielle (Odette Yustman), whose work is depicted as near white slavery. Within days, he and his less evolved friend Vincent (Chris Johnson) are thrust into a power struggle that wins them important positions in the corrupt club scene.

PARADE OF CLICHÉS: Slow motion, cleavage, beefy bouncers, club rats and people having sex like rabbits. A crime boss played by Giancarlo Esposito sports a Tony Montana accent as he tries to take over the club run by Arielle's new squeeze Alex (Lee Thompson Young). In case it's not obvious he's the villain, the soundtrack screams menace.

STILTED DIALOGUE: "You can't let the pastel surfaces and sunlight fool you. South Beach will eat you alive."

OLD HANDS: 1980s icon Michael Paré (Eddie and the Cruisers , Streets of Fire) as Matt's father triggers the plot when he steals his son's college fund to pay off shady associates. Vanessa Williams, entering her hot-matron phase, plays Alex's mother. She owns the hotel and club where most of the action takes place.

BOTTOM LINE: The former lovers are appealing, but they're surrounded by cartoons.

Manuel Mendoza

C-Premieres 7 tonight, UPN (Channel 21), 2 hrs.