By now, every fan of The Bachelorette knows the name Chad.
Chad is, by all accounts, the bad guy and so-called "villain" vying to win the heart of JoJo Fletcher, Dallas' pride and joy who's hacking her way to the reality television version of the man of her dreams.
Most times, much to the chagrin of viewers, Chad's type of crazy sticks around — who are we to deny prime time viewers of good drama, right? — but the twist this season seems to come from the bachelorette herself. Fletcher, who is both a local real estate developer and arguably the most articulate bachelorette in history, called Chad's bluff on Monday night's episode. Week three in the bachelorette mansion was truly a story of the nice guys finishing first.
Here's how it went down ...
The third week in Bachelorette romance was comprised of three dates — two solo and one group. The first handsome young man to earn the honor of a solo excursion with Fletcher was Chase, a medical sales rep. from Highlands Ranch, Colo. who spent last week sequestered and dateless. Monday, Chase and JoJo's relationship went from zero to 60 after taking an intimate yoga lesson, notably unlike any yoga lesson I've ever taken because it ended up in a forceful make-out session. (Note to viewers: The next time a yoga teacher asks you to sit straddling your partner, you know what you're in for.)
So nice-guy Chase came out of the exclusive date on top (well, technically bottom). So did sensitive singer-songwriter James Taylor. He garnered the second solo date Monday, and almost burst into tears when he heard the news. But he's definitely not one to be underestimated.
Monday, Fletcher challenged James to swing dancing lessons, which he took in stride though he was gifted two left feet. The couple later participated in a swing dancing flash mob — yes, it's as epic as it sounds — and spent a romantic evening overlooking the Los Angeles skyline.
If you're feeling badly about your love life, consider how JoJo's group date went. The Dallasite, who is unabashedly open and communicative, took 12 ego-driven men to a comedy house for "Sex Talks," a safe, nationally-televised space where people reveal their "deepest, darkest sex secrets," according to the show's host.
Bring on the reality TV gold!
Most men got into the idea, telling scandalous stories about being caught in nothing but a condom (ehem, Grant) or about tying someone up and cutting their hair off (seriously Daniel?). Wells, the scrawny but sexy radio DJ from Nashville, even got a shout out for his "hysterical threesome story," the details of which were left on the cutting room floor.
Where's the drama, you ask? Let us turn to Evan Bass, the erectile dysfunction expert with the offensive goatee. Evan seized the opportunity to throw built-and-stacked Chad under the bus.
Instead of telling a personal story, Evan told a "cautionary tale" about the dangers of steroid use and calling the woman you're dating "naggy." (Sound familiar?) Though it wasn't aired, Evan's testimony suggested to link steroid use with impotence, which isn't unheard of. Chad, however, wasn't amused.
When the beefcake passed Evan to go to the stage, he grabbed and ripped Evan's shirt. Most on The Bachelorette called it "an altercation." We called it a, "Gasp, #*@^% back up off me."
Chad then proceeded to the stage were his performance fell flat. After asking JoJo to be a volunteer to his act, Chad looked her deep in the eyes and said ...
"Today's not about the past, it's about the future."
He then leaned in for a kiss he would never receive; Fletcher turned her cheek because he's obviously a screw loose.
After the date ended, the cocktail party was equally as tense. Chad threatened Evan with a casual "You're going to die," and blamed his anger on Evan's physicality (which, by the way, he has none of).
If Chad had any saving grace it was Daniel, the Canadian model who got white girl wasted during the premiere. But even Daniel couldn't help Chad for fear of losing his reputation.
"Let's pretend you're Hitler..." said Daniel.
"Let's not pretend I'm Hitler," rebutted Chad.
"OK well let's say you're Donald Trump or something like that," Daniel insisted, "if I hang out with you, it'll make me look bad too, right?"
Monday night was a big, hot mess in the best way possible. And it got even better when JoJo gave Chad the proverbial middle finger by donning Evan with the group date rose. Again, Chad was not amused and gives Fletcher plenty of facial expressions to communicate this.
"You're being disrespectful and I don't like this side of you," she snapped at him in front of all the guys. Bench press that Chad!
We still have two hours of The Bachelorette to catch Tuesday night, and Fletcher has yet to send anyone home. Stick with us for what's expected to be a drama- and possibly blood-filled pool party at the mansion. Catch tomorrow's episode at 7 p.m. CST on ABC.